No, No Toupee For Me

Why do men where toupees? A toupee is a ridiculous piece of fake hair that only fools the fool who wears it. I see countless numbers of middle-aged and old men walking around with these silly hair hats, and for what reason?

If you’re covered in liver spots and have bulging stomach … do you really think that that silly looking dead animal glue to your head is going to get a young woman interested in you?

This blog is dedicating to outing these men so that they can be free from this debacle of delusion. As a bit of self disclosure I have to tell you that I myself am going bald you’re my grandfather was bald and my brother is going bald so I imagine it’s just a matter of time for I become one of those chrome domes. But I will never wear a toupee. I will never wear a toupee. Sure I might wear a baseball cap or don a bandanna, but I will never wear a toupee.

I honestly hope that somebody who is thinking about wearing a toupee stumbles across this blog and it helps him change his mind. The trouble with starting to wear a toupee is that eventually you’ll get sick of wearing it in maintaining but feel compelled to continue holding this travesty to your scalp – because you you’re afraid people will laugh at you when they realize that you’ve been wearing a toupee all this time. Uh, duh. They’ve been laughing at you all this time.

Really they are. I think one of the reasons that old men think they are getting away with wearing a toupee is that no one says anything to them. When you were kid if you wore a stupid looking jacket or carried the wrong kind of school bag to school your friends quickly ridicule you right to your face. The jacket would go into the back of the closet and you tell your mom that you lost your school bag. But when you’re flabby little aged guy wearing a wig most other adults will just gossip about you behind your back and give you a nice smile to your face. Unless your friends are idiots, they know you’re wearing a wig.